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Dude. That’s not her cousin Tall Bar.
You’ve never been to her place.
- There’s a reason she always wants to do your place, and it’s not just that you have good toilet paper. She’s not going to annoy her roommates with a never-ending parade of randoms; instead, she’ll do the respectable thing and scurry in and out of your door at all hours.
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No Instagrams of you guys? Not ever? There’s no way you’re the only one. Even the most down-to-earth girl wants a public selfie with her man every once in a while. If she asks you not to tag her in pictures, then she’s also asking you to be cool with the fact that there are others.
She never wants to spend the night.
- She just sleeps better in her own bed. (And has sex better in other guys’ beds.)
If you do meet her friends, they all look at you with pity.
There’s not supposed to be a question mark at the end of “I’ve heard so much about you?”She frequently flakes on you last minute.
- You have wine and cookies and that movie she mentioned all cued up. She has … not texted you back in over an hour. When she finally does, it’s to tell you that she’s “so sorry” (she’s not), and that she “fell asleep again” (she didn’t). Habitual last-minute flaking means she either has doubts about seeing you at all, or she got caught up on another man’s penis.
Most of your “dates” are just sex.
Unless you count that one time you guys shared your leftover Chinese food, you two have never actually been on a date, which isn’t for lack of trying on your part. She acts excited when you suggest going to a movie sometime, but the only thing she ever seems to want to see is the first 10 minutes of whatever you guys put on before you start hooking up.You’ve gotten a few flirty texts that didn’t quite make sense.
That’s so funny. Why would she call you “Pooh Bear”? And what is “Just like your sushi?” in reference to? What does it all mean?! These texts must be meant for you because they’re filled with kissing emojis and … oh no. This might not be so funny after all.- --MTVNEWS
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